


Sans, M.D.

by ElectraAthene, ShadowOnTheFullMoon



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Underfell, Alternate Universe - Underswap, House MD inspired, Multi, One-Shot Collection, hospital au, no story is related unless stated other wise, ocs are mainly paitients, there was no real reason for this other then i love house, undertale - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-24
Updated: 2016-08-24
Packaged: 2018-08-10 20:20:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,263
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7859779
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ElectraAthene/pseuds/ElectraAthene, https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShadowOnTheFullMoon/pseuds/ShadowOnTheFullMoon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hospital Au One shot collection based on House M.D. centered around Ebott Hospital and its doctors, Sans, his team: Chara, Frisk, and Kid, their friends/ family. </p><p>Stories are non-relatated unless stated otherwise.<br/>Different aus might pop up.<br/>Requests and Prompts welcomed.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> IMPORTANT INFORMATION FOR WHEN YOUR REQUESTING: This will mainly be UNDERTALE. You may request other aus, but not to often. Please refrain from constantly Request UNDERSWAP. As i find it sad that it has more stories/art than the original. not saying you can't request it just don't do it repeated. there will be a list of of prompts/request that you can check to make sure you don't over request something.   
> Pairing requests: Pairings we will NOT do: Soriel, Edgeberry,   
> Please respect our choices.   
> This is the ONLY time this will be posted.
> 
> Undertale and all its AUs that may be written about belong to their respectful owners.

St. Ebott Hospital was one of the most well known hospitals in Ebott. It was most likely the fact that it was one of the few hospitals in the world that had both monsters and human staff, and the only one who had a Head of Administration that was a monster. Toriel Dreemurr was the Dean of Medicine and ran the hospital smoothly without any problems. This was one of the few reasons most humans didn't like the hospital. As more and more monsters seemed to be taking jobs, mostly it was the fact that they just out right hated monsters and didn't want to go to a hospital run by one, even if it was the best in the city or town.

Most of the doctors in charge were indeed monsters, which caused more. Three of which were skeletons, the eldest W.D Gaster was the Head of Oncology and the father of Sans and Papyrus, the other two skeletons. Papyrus the younger of the two was the head of the Pediatric Center, and Sans the eldest, was the Head of the Diagnostic Medicine department. The Skeleton family was the best doctors in the hospital and the best it could offer when there was a case that was bad. The three relied on each other when they needed help or just a consult. While they were good at their jobs, one of them stirred more troubled every time he had a case.

Sans wasn't your typical doctor. He was lazy, arrogant, and did not like to follow the rules. Sans tended to go about his own way when there was a case that he was interested in. He took risks most doctors wouldn't and he did things that should get his license taken away. But he was the best, he got the job done and saved lives, and that was what mattered in the end. The fact that he was out of line half the time didn't matter if he saved a dying patient in the nick of time when another doctor could have easily killed them.

This is what made Comic Sans Serif, one of the most famous doctors in the world. And Ebott Hospital still has patients coming in.


	2. Everybody Lies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pilot. Undertale. 
> 
> Done in honor of the show that inspired this collection of trash lol.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shadow-Don't question my methods of giving Sans a fucked up leg. just relax. there is a reason for it.

{Rachael Summers, 29 year old female, lost the ability to speak, has a seizure, and loses consciousness shortly after coming into her class.} Dr. W.D Gaster told his eldest who was walking beside him, limping slowly as to not agitate his leg more than it already was. Gaster eyed him worriedly for a few seconds, but didn’t say anything. Sans glanced around, he saw his twin, Papyrus walking over to join them and gave a quick smile.

"They think I'm a patient because of the cane." Sans said bitterly, as he caught a few glances from the patients sitting around. He hated being treated differently. He was a doctor, he didn't want the false pity.

"If you wore a lab coat like the rest of us, you wouldn't have that problem." Papyrus said, as he joined his family’s side. Sans rolled his eyes.

"I don't want them to think I'm a doctor." He pointed out.

{You see where administration would have a problem with that attitude? It's a wonder how Toriel hasn't fired you.} Gaster said.

"no one wants a sick doctor." Sans told the taller skeleton.

"Fair enough, we don't want healthy patients." Papyrus countered. Sans shrugged not arguing with his brother’s logic. They’d be out of a job if everyone were healthy.

{Back to the issue at hand the 29 year olds-} Gaster started, only to have Sans cut him off.

"got a brain tumor, she's going to die. Boring." Sans told him with a sigh.

{No wonder you so renowned. Didn't even have to look at the patient, or know anything.} Gaster said, in fake surprise. Sans looked up at him and smirked.

"you're the oncologist. i'm just a lowly infectious diseases guy." He said.

{Brain tumors at her age are highly unlikely} Gaster told his son.

"she's 29! Anything she has is highly unlikely!" Sans said. Gaster handed the file to the shorter skeleton who took it but didn't look at it.

{The protein markers for the 3 most prevalent brain cancers didn't show in her blood tests.} Gaster informed. Sans barely glanced at the file before meeting his father’s gaze. He handed the file back.

"That's an HMO lab." He said, turning to continue walking. His family following.

{no family history.} Gaster said.

"did you even check?" Sans asked, getting a nasty look from his father.

{yes, of course.} Gaster said. {No environmental factors.}

"That you know of." Sans said.

{Not responding to radiation treatment.} Gaster sighed out.

"None of which is dispositive." Sans told Gaster. Before Gaster could continue to minor argument, Papyrus cut in.

"Your staff is getting bored. Give them the case, it'll give them something to do, you don't have be involved, entirely." Papyrus told Sans. Gaster looked at Sans. The shorter skeleton sighed started for the elevator.

"No." he said. Gaster groaned as Papyrus frowned. They followed after the shorter skeleton.

~*~*~Line~*~*~

Back in Sans’ office, was his team, Frisk, Chara, and Kid. Chara, one of the humans, had auburn hair, red eyes and rosy cheeks. She was leaning against the wall watching the other two occupants in the room. Frisk, the other human, had brown hair and green eyes. He sat in a chair with a crossword in one hand and pen in the other as he thought. Kid was an armless lizard like monster. He had yellow scales and spikes on his head going down his back. He sat at a desk magic forming arms for him as he worked. Kid and Frisk are both wearing smocks showing that they are hospital employees, while Chara was wearing a tank top and cargo pants.

"It's been a week, and I've yet to see a patient. This all we do?" Chara asked, clearly bored and unsatisfied with the situation.

"Until the checks start bouncing." Frisk murmured. "... Nine letters, iodine deficiency in children." He said.

"Cretinism." Chara answered. Frisk looked at the puzzle and wrote it down. The red-eyed human looked over at Kid. "How long have you worked here?"

"6 months." Kid answered, not looking up from his work.

"Specialty?" Chara asked.

"Immunology." Kid answered.

"…So what he can't afford a secretary?" Chara asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Doesn't need one." Frisk told her as he continued working on the puzzle.

"He's got him answered his mail!" Chara pointed out.

"No he doesn't." Frisk said looking up. "What are you doing?" he asked kid looking over at the lizard. Kid glanced up before turning back to the computer.

"Answering his mail." he stated.

"See!" Chara asked, snorting. “that’s just pathetic.”

"Doesn't mean he makes Kid do it." Frisk pointed out looking at the woman. Before Chara could speak Kid explained.

"He throws out all the requests for consults. I reply to them and apologize that he's too busy." Kid said, before going back to work. Chara sighed and rolled her eyes and plopped down in a chair crossing her arms. 

~*~line~*~

Sans, Papyrus, and Gaster were stopped at the elevator waiting. Sans tapped his fingers on the top of his can impatiently.

{Just take the case.}

"No, there's nothing interesting about it." Sans complained a slight whine to his voice. He glared at the folder his father was holding out to him.

"Maybe there is. It'll give you something to do, you can't just sit around all day, brother. Stop being such a lazy bones!" Papyrus said. The elevator dinged, and the doors opened. Sans turned moving to get on, but Gaster grabbed his cane. Sans looked up at him.

"Would you grab someone's leg?" he asked. Gaster gave him a look.

{it's important to me Sans.}

Sans paused and stared at his father, "Everything is important to you. Let go of my cane." He said.

{We're not done.} Gaster said.

"Just take the case, please?" Papyrus asked. Sans looked at his bother and groaned.. The elevator started to beep, and Sans gave in.

"…Intraventricular lesion, right?" he guessed.

{Right.} Gaster said releasing his son's cane and handing him the file. Sans turned and got on the elevator. {…Wait I never said..}

"If it were anywhere else you wouldn't need me." Sans told him as the doors closed.

~*~*~Sans' Office~*~*~

"It's a lesion." Chara said.

"And that green thing in the middle of the bigger blue thing on a map in an island." Sans stated, looking at his neurologist. "I was looking for something more creative."

"Shouldn't we speak to the patient?" Chara questioned.

"Is she a doctor?" Sans countered.

"No but-"

"Everybody lies." Sans said, cutting the human off.

"Dr. Sans doesn't like dealing with patients." Kid explained. Chara frowned, tilting her head.

"Isn't that the whole point of being a doctor?" she asked.

"No. The point is to treat illness, treating patients is what makes doctors miserable." Sans corrected. "I don't think it's a tumor." He said looking at the rest of his team.

"You're basically taking away the monster and humanity out of the equation." Chara interrupted.

"If we don't talk to them they can't lie to us. And we can't lie to them. Monster kind and humanity is overrated." Sans said. "Differential diagnosis, people." He tapped his cane against the floor. Kid and Frisk immediately started listing things on instinct, bouncing ideas around.

Frisk, "Aneurysm, stroke, or some other ischemic syndrome."

Kid, "Wyburn-Mason syndrome."

Sans, "Get her a contrast MRI."

"Creutzfeldt-Jacob Disease." Kid said.

Sans looked at him, "Mad cow?" he asked. "Draw cerebrospinal fluid; check for the 14-3-3 protein and, while you're there, check for lymphocytic and eosinophilic pleocytosis." Sans told his team.

Kid, "Progressive Multifocal Leukoencephalopathy."

Sans, "Contrast MRI again."

Chara spoke up joining in, "Wernicke's Encephalopathy."

Sans shook his head, "No. Blood tests were normal for thiamine."

"Blood abscess." Frisk said

"The contrast MRI will help…" Sans started glaring at Chara as she cut him off.

"Attending could have screwed up the tests." She said. As suddenly as it started the back and forth stopped, Sans turned from Frisk to Chara. He motioned for her to continue. "I assume it's a corollary of 'people lie' that 'people screw up'." She said. Sans grinned at her, and nodded his head in approval.

"Well done, double check all blood tests." He told her then he looked at the others. "And get her scheduled for a contrast MRI." He added. He watched as his team left to do as they were told.

~*~*~Sans, M.D.~*~*~

Sans glanced to the side and cursed quietly pressing the button for the elevator a few times.

"You were supposed to be in my office 30 minutes ago." Toriel said. The goat monster glared at the skeleton. Sans looked up at her.

"Really? I had no intentions of being there." He said.

"You think we have nothing to talk about?" the dean asked crossing her arms.

"No, just can't think of anything that would interest me." Sans corrected grinning.

"I sign your paychecks." Toriel reminded him. Sans shrugged. The doors open and the skeleton glanced at the other monster as he went to step in.

"gonna grab my cane, stop me from leaving?" he asked.

"that's juvenile." Toriel said stepping into the elevator with him. From there a simple back and forth starts. Sans is half listening not really interested in what his boss is saying. The doors open he steps out, and she follows. She mentions the reason she doesn't fire him and he can't help but reply with a smart-ass response. They keep going until they get to the doors and then Sans makes a break for it outside and to his car.

~*~*~Time Skip~*~*~

Sans stormed into the hospital, "Where the hell is Toriel?" he demanded. A few nurses jumped and pointed toward the dean's office and Sans limped towards it throwing the doors open as he entered. He took out the pill bottle in his pocket and took one as Toriel looked up at him.

"You pulled my authorization!" Sans yelled.

"Yes. Why are you yelling?" Toriel asked.

"no radiology, no tests…" Sans started as he paced the large office.

"You also can't make long distance phone calls." Toriel said. Sans stopped and spun to face her slamming his hands down on her desk.

"If you're going to fire me, then do it to my face!" he hissed, magic sparking in his left eye socket.

"Or photocopies, you're still yelling." Toriel pointed out, leaning back in her chair.

"I'm angry!" Sans yelled, standing up straight. "You're risking a patient's life!"

Toriel, "I assume those are two separate points."

"You are showing me disrespect. You embarrassed me. As long as I work here you have no legal right-"

"Is this supposed to scare me? Of what? More yelling? Gonna hit me? I'm pretty sure I'll out run you." Toriel told him, grinning. Sans finally sat down, seeming to calm down. It was impossible to stay angry when Toriel talked straight to him. He hated it, but he still respected it, plus she was one of few that he considered a close friend. He gripped his cane and lowered his head. "You can't always get what you want." She told him. Sans scoffed tapping his cane on the floor remembering the barely listened to conversation as he was on his way out.

"You want me to treat patients, so you're not letting me treat my patients?" he asked.

"I need you to do your job, Sans. You care about something here; I don’t know what exactly, but it gives me the upper hand." Toriel told him. Sans sighed and stood.

"Fine, you'll get you clinic hours." He told her.

"Thank you." Toriel said. 

“yeah, yeah, what ever…” Sans said as he left the office. He spotted his brother, father and his team waiting for him. Sans looked over at his team. "She gave in, do the MRI." He ordered, before limping away. He heard Gaster and Papyrus follow. "I'm doing 4 hours a week in the clinic to make up the time I missed." Sans told them. Gaster and Papyrus looked at one another and sighed.

~*~*~Outside of Patients room~*~*~

Sans stood outside the room popping a pill to dull the ache in his leg. He glanced around, watching people as he waited. Inside the room he could hear his doctors talking to the patient, only really half listening but paying enough attention to keep him informed. He'd gathered that the patient had an allergic reaction, and that luckily Kid had been in the room. He listened for a few more minutes and stood straight as his team came out.

"Told you, you can't trust people." He said.

"She knew she was allergic. Figured it was the easiest way to get a hole cut in her throat." Kid said.

"Her motives aren't really relevant to us mortals, are they?" Sans asked. "Any chance we can make this work?"

"High chance of other allergies." Kid said.

"Low chance of getting another release signed." Frisk added. Sans sighed, and rubbed at his face.

"Go take a patient history." He told Chara. "We need to know the possibility of a genetic cause, or environmental factor setting off an inflammation reaction. Check everything."

"Thought everyone lied." Chara teased with a grin.

"Truth begins in lies." Sans said looking at her. "Think about it." with that he walked away. Chara frowned and looked at her colleagues.

"That doesn't mean anything…. Right?" she asked. Frisk and Kid shrugged, before turning to get to work. Chara sighed and did the same.

~*~*~Sans, M.D.~*~*~

Sans walked into the clinic and went to the receptionist, "2:52, Dr. Sans checks in. Write that down please. You have cable here? My show starts in eight minutes."

"No TV; but we've got patients." Toriel said walking over. Sans turned to her.

"Can't you hand the Tylenol out yourself? I'll do paperwork." Sans told her. Toriel rolled her eyes handing him a file.

"I made sure it's interesting. 32 year old human male, complaining about back spasms. He is also orange." She said. Sans paused, narrowing his eyes looking up at his friend in confusion.

“…the color?" he asked.

"No, the fruit." Toriel said sarcastically.

"Nothing turns you orange." Sans argued.

"That's why it's interesting. Exam room 1." She told him. Sans turned and headed straight for the room. As he walked he couldn't help but wonder what the hell the human he was about to see did to turn himself orange. He entered the room and stopped. Sans blinked twice, the patient was indeed, orange. The man looked up.

"I was golfing, cleats got stuck. It hurt a bit but not bad enough to stop playing… next day I could hardly stand.” The human said looking at him. Sans can't help but grin widely. The guy was orange and he was complaining about his back. Oh this was great. "You're smiling, so this isn't serious?"

Sans chuckled to himself and popped a pill into his mouth, swallowing it dry.

"What is that?" the human asked.

"Pain killer." Sans said.

"Oh, for your leg…" the guy said. Sans rolled his eyes.

"No, because they’re yummy." He said sarcastically. "Want one? It'll help your back." The man blinked but took one, "… you have a worse problem. Your wife is having an affair."

"WHAT!?" the man yelled, looking at the skeleton in shock. Sans looked at him.

"You're orange. It's one thing for you not to notice. If your wife hasn't noticed she isn't paying attention. She's cheating." Sans told the human. "do you eat a lot of tomatoes and carrots?" the man nods dumbly. "One turns you yellow the other red, do the math. And get a good lawyer." Sans said, before promptly leaving the man.

~*~*~With the kids~*~*~

"Just a poodle." The young teacher, Rachael said.

"Poodle are hypoallergenic; is that why you got one?" Chara asked. Rachael shook her head.

"No." she answered.

"How about at school? Any animal? Any birds?" the neurologist asked.

"Got gerbil. But one of the kids dropped a book on it." Rachael answered.

"Do you work anywhere else?" the human questioned.

"No."

"Ever been sick?"

"Yes."

"Think you can be more specific?" Kid asked.

"No, I want to know everything." Chara said.

~*~*~Back to Sans~*~*~

Sans sat on the stool examining the patient chart of a 10-year-old boy. The child sat on the table while his mother stood nearby.

"Has he been using his inhaler?" Sans asked, looking at the fidgeting mother.

"Not in a few days. I worry about kids taking such strong medication frequently." She answered. Sans stared at her.

"What happened to your leg?" the boy asked. Sans ignored him.

"Your doctor was probably worried about it to… they probably weighed that danger against the danger of not breathing." He told the mother. "Oxygen is so important in these early years, don't you think?" he asked. The mother was too shocked to respond. Sans continued. "You know what asthma is, right? Either you do and don't understand, or you don't know. A stimulant triggers cells in your child's airways to become inflamed." Sans paused as he thought of something, before he continued. "The muscles in the walls of the airways contract, mucus production increases, the cell lining starts to shed."

Sans stood, as he thought the information over, "but steroids stop the inflammation. The more this happens..." he stopped and turned leaving the room in a hurry.

"What? The more it happens what?" the mother cried after him. Sans called back not pausing.

"Forget it!You don't trust steroids you shouldn't trust doctors." He yelled over his shoulder.

~*~*~Back to the kids~*~*~

Kid paused as his beeper went off, he checked it, as Chara continued questioning the patient. He cut in when he saw who it was.

"It's Sans. It's urgent." He told Chara. The human blinked and the two turn and left the room ready to go to their boss's office but stopped seeing him waiting outside the room. 

"You couldn't have knocked?" Chara asked, crossing her arms as she raised an eyebrow.

"Give Summers steroids. High doses of prednisone." Sans ordered.

"Why? What does she have?" Chara asked.

"Any history of leg ulcers?" Sans asked.

"She has a varicose vein." Chara answered. Kid paused and looked at Sans as he caught on to what his boss was hinting at quickly.

"You're looking for support for a diagnosis of temporal vasculitis. The inflammation of blood vessels in the brain is rare. Especially for someone her age." Kid said, frowning.

"So is a tumor." Sans said turning to the immunologist. "Blood tests show any evidence of anemia?"

"Minor." Chara answered.

"Could be something, or nothing." Kid added.

"You're right. I've got no reason to think it is vasculitis. But it could be. If the blood vessels are inflamed it's going to look like a lesion on the regular MRI. The process is going to cause neurological symptoms." Sans explained.

"But we can't test for it without a biopsy." Kid argued/

"Yes we can, We treat it. If she gets better, we know we were right." Sans told him. Kid shifted nervously.

"And if we're wrong?" he asked worriedly.

"Then we learn something else." Sans replied. "Information is in short supply here." He said.

"She gets worse." Kid said. "Maybe a lot worse, Maybe she…" Sans cut the monster off quickly.

"How much worse can she get? Find Frisk. Start Summers on prednisone." Sans said. Kid sighed, nodding and rushed off. Sans sighed as well and looked at his neurologist. "You had lunch?" he asked. Chara blinked and shook her head.

~*~*~With Frisk and Kid~*~*~

Frisk wrote a few notes down in the patient’s chart. On the other side of the bed, Kid stood preparing the medicine to give to Rachael. She looked weak, but the ventilator was out and she could talk; though it was difficult.

"Why steroids?" she asked weakly as she watched the young lizard monster. Kid gave her a small reassuring smile.

"Just part of your treatment." He said. "You haven't had many visitors. No boyfriend?" he asked. The human smiled a little.

"Three dates. I wouldn't have stood by him if he was vomiting all day long." She said.

"How about work? You must have some friends from there." Frisk mentioned.

"Everybody I like is 5 years old." Rachael chuckled softly. She shifted and changed the topic, "The nurse said you stopped my radiation." She said.

"Just trying some alternative medication." Kid said, as he went to give her the injection only to have the human cover her arm stopping him.

"Steroids aren't an alternative to radiation." She pointed out.

"The tests weren't really…" Kid started trying to avoid the issue at hand; all he wanted was to give the patient the shot.

"We're treating you for vasculitis. An inflammation of blood vessels in your brain." Frisk said, cutting Kid off.

"I don't have a tumor?" Rachael asked relieved.

"We do not know for sure." Kid told her. The teacher frowned in confusion looking between the two.

"You wouldn't do this if you didn't think it was a tumor." She said.

"If it is vasculitis the steroids will reduce the swelling." Frisk informed her. Rachael blinked and gave a nod smiling gratefully.

"Thank you." she said.

"We didn't do anything." Kid said. "We just made the diagnosis." He gave the human the shot and stepped back. After talking with Rachael for a few more minutes the doctors left. "You should have told her the truth." Kid said to Frisk once they were out of the room.

"If Sans is right, there's no harm. If he is wrong, I've given her a few days of hope-"

"False hope." Kid cut in.

"Any hope is better than none." Frisk stated.

~*~*~Sans and Undyne~*~*~

The two sat at a table in the cafeteria. Chara was eating while Sans sat opposite of her. The skeleton didn’t have any food. He was watching the other occupants of the room.

"What's she lying about?" Sans asked. Chara looked up at him. She swallowed the food in her mouth and shifted.

"She's a kindergarten teacher." She told him. Sans looked at her.

"And if I was a kindergarten student, I'd trust her." He said.

"I'll double check with her GP." Chara said. Sans shook his head.

"I don't trust him. Or her." The skeleton said. The red-eyed human raised an eyebrow.

"You don't even know the guy. Or her." She pointed out. Sans leaned back in the chair shrugging as he crossed his arms

"Don't need too." He said. Chara gave him a look. Sans rolled his eyes, before flicking his eyes toward the lady that was handing out food. "I'm going to give you a 'for instance'. That lady making the egg salad back there; her eyes are glossy, did you notice that?" he asked. Chara looked over at the woman just as she wiped her nose on her sleeve. She looked back at Sans.

"The policy of the hospital is to stay home if you're sick. But if you're making 8 dollars an hour, you need the money, don't you? The sign in the bathroom says employees must wash after using the facilities, but I figure someone who wipes a sniff on their sleeve isn't very hyper-concerned with sanitary conditions. What do you think? Should I trust her?" Sans asked, before Chara could answer he spoke again. "I want you to check the patient's home for contaminants, pets, parrots, garbage, medication…" Sans trailed off.

"Her sister flies in tonight, I'll have her ask-"

"Would the police call for permission before dropping by to check out a crime scene?" Sans asked. Chara blinked.

"It's not a crime scene." She said.

"We don't know that. We don't know anything; we know nothing that she doesn't want us to know." Sans said. "First principals: if we don't know anything, we don't trust anyone."

"What am I going to do? I can't break into her house." Chara said. Sans looked at her, if he could, he would have raised an eyebrow.

"Isn't that how you got in the Snowdrake's home?" the doctor asked, the question threw the human off. She stared as Sans in a shocked silence. The skeleton smirked. "You didn't think I'd hire you without some knowledge of your past did you? The court records are sealed and you were sixteen, it was a stupid mistake." He said.

"…Why did you…?" she trailed off.

"I needed someone around here with street smarts, knows when they’re being conned and how to con." Sans explained. Chara glared at him.

"I should sue your ass." She growled. Sans smirked.

"Can't sue someone for wrongful hiring." He said.

"I can for you firing me for not committing a B&E." She snarled. Sans continued to smirk as the human picked up her sandwich and took a bite.

After lunch, Sans returned to the clinic and hid away in one of the examination rooms. He laid on the table relaxing as he read People Magazine. The door opened and Toriel walked in looking very pissed off. Sans glanced up at her then back at his magazine.

"I'm doing research, people are fascinating aren't they?" he asked.

"Why are you giving Summers steroids?" Toriel demanded. Sans set the magazine down and stood.

"Because she's my patient. That's what you do with patients; you give them medicine." He answered.

"You don't prescribe medicine based on guesses." Toriel told him. "At least we don't since Tuskegee and Mengele." She added.

"You're comparing me to a Nazi? Nice." Sans said, snickering.

"I'm stopping the treatment." The dean said, before she turned and left. Sans took off after her cursing as he moved as fast as he could to keep up with his boss.

"She is my patient." He said.

"It's my hospital." Toriel shot back.

"I didn't make her sick! She is not an experiment; I have a legitimate theory of what is wrong with her." He said, falling a bit behind the goat monster.

"With no point!" she argued.

"There's never any proof! 5 doctors can give 5 different diagnoses based on the same evidence-" Sans started to argue back, Toriel cut in throwing a look at him.

"You don't have any evidence." She said. They entered the Lobby and Toriel pulled ahead of Sans taking quick strides across the lobby, Sans cursed his leg as he tried to catch up. Toriel had reached the elevator and was pressing the button. The elevator was taking too long and gave Sans enough time to catch up to Toriel. She spun on him as soon as he got to her.

"Nobody knows anything, huh? So why do you think you're always right?" she questioned.

"I don't, I just find it difficult to operate on an opposite assumption." Sans answered. Toriel stepped away and opened the stairwell door. Sans scowled, "Why are you so afraid to make a mistake, Tori?" he asked.

"Because I'm a doctor. If we make a mistake, people die." She told him, before rushing up the stairs. Sans watched, unable to follow. He shouted up after her, bitterly.

"You know people used to have more respect for cripples!" he yelled, he returned to the elevator and paused seeing a human in a wheel chair looking at him. He clearly had heard Sans' comment. "They didn't really." He told them as he pressed the button. Once the doors open he stepped in and pressed the button to the floor his patient was on. He knew that he'd arrive too late, so he hopped that the treatment had done something to improve Summers. The elevator dinged, and the doors open and Sans stepped out heading straight for the patient's room. He stopped outside and looked in, he saw Summers sitting up, she seemed to be doing better, and she was even eating. At the foot of the bed checking the chart was Toriel.

"Much better, thank you. Are you dr. Sans? I thought he was a he but…"

"No, I’m not him… Don't eat too much too fast." Toriel said.

"Thank him for me." Summers said.

"Right." Toriel smiled, and turned coming out of the room, passing Sans.

"Should I discontinue the treatment, Boss?" Sans asked glancing after her. She stopped and looked at him

"You got lucky." She said before continuing to walk away. Sans looked back into the room.

"I took a chance." He said, giving a sighing sigh of relief. Toriel was gone and Sans was left alone, until he turned and walked away from the room as well.

~*~*~That Night~*~*~

Gaster was visiting Summers, sitting opposite of her. She was still doing better.

"Am I ever going to meet Dr. Sans?" she asked. Gaster smiled, and shrugged.

{You might run into him at a movie or on the subway.} he said.

"Is he a good man?" Summers asked, curiously. Gaster blinked and chuckled.

{He's a good Doctor.} Gaster answered. Summers tilted her head.

"Can you be one without the other? Don't you have to care about people?" she asked.

{Caring is a great motivation.} Gaster said. {He's found something else.}

Summers nodded. It got silent before she spoke again asking another question. "He's your son, right?" Gaster nodded. "He cares about you?"

{…I'd like to think so.} Gaster chuckled.

"You don't know?" Summers asked. Gaster smiled.

{Everybody lies.} he said.

"It's not what they say, it's what they do." Summers said. Gaster smiles a little more.

{My son is… complicated. But yes, he cares about me, and he cares about his brother as well.} Gaster said. The room fell silent again and Gaster started to stand, deciding it was about time he headed home. He stopped when Summers froze.

"…I can't see." She whispered. Gaster frowned, and moved to her side to check her eyes. "I can't see!" Summers cried fully panicked, before falling back onto the bed in a seizure. Gaster cursed and yelled for help. The code was immediately announced to send a team straight to the patient's room. They rushed in and are at the bed side holding down the convulsing patient as Gaster checked her eyes.

{She's nonresponsive; she's conscious but eyes are fixed-" he got cut off by the sound of the patient flat-lining. The team rushed forward, as the doctors were thrown into a frantic act to save Summers life.

~*~*~Sans' Office~*~*~

Summers was awake, she had fallen into a coma for nearly twelve hours but was currently stable. Chara had just returned from checking up on her. She reported on what happened in the room. Frisk spoke up first.

"She couldn't put the cards in order?" he asked. "Could the lack of oxygen from her seizure cause damage?"

"Don't think so. I gave her the same test 5 minutes later and she did fine. The disorientation comes and goes. Just like the verbal skills." Chara said. Sans stayed silent listening to his team, eyes flicking between them as they spoke.

"So what's going to happen?" Kid asked.

"The aphasia will come and go, with increasing frequency and duration. Same with the apraxia; disorientation…" Chara was cut off by Frisk

"How can you be sure? We don't even know what she has." He said.

"I don't need to know what it is; I just need to know where it is. Given the latest symptom, it's clearly growing in the temporal lobe. Soon she won't be able to walk with any consistency. Blindness after that; then the more fundamental organs will start to fail." Chara explained. It went silent, everyone knew what that meant. Sans broke the silence looking at the red-eyed human

"How long do we have?" he asked. Chara shrugged.

"Depends. If it's a grade 4 tumor, it'll move fast, she could be dead in two weeks. If it's ischemic, it's more likely chronic. If it's an infectious agent, that'll probably be the fastest of all. Maybe a week." she said. Sans stared at a fixed point on the carpet, thinking before he finally spoke.

"…Stop all treatment." He said.

"I still think it's a tumor, we should go back to radiation." Chara suggested.

"She didn't respond to radiation." Frisk cut in.

"Maybe she did and we didn't notice." Chara argued.

"No, it's not a tumor. The steroids did something." Sans said.

"Placebo effect. I told her she'd feel better so she did." Frisk said. Sans shook his head.

"No," he said sternly. "the steroids did something. I just don't know what." he said.

"So we're going to just watch her die?" Chara asked.

"No. we're watching how fast she's dying. You outlined the various time frames that the various diagnoses will follow." Sans told her. He looked around at the others. "Once we see how fast it's killing her, we'll know what it is."

"By then it could be too late." Kid argued.

"There's got to be a better way, something we can do instead of just watching her die." Frisk said desperately. They all are desperate, but only Frisk is showing it. Sans sighed.

"I'm open to alternatives." He said, looking each one of them in the eyes. No one spoke up. Sans waited for a few more minutes before waving his hand. "Go." He said. His team left the room.

"I'll take the first watch." Kid said, before walking away. Chara turns to Frisk.

"I need you for an hour or so." she said.

"What's up?" he said.

"When you break into someone's house it's always best to have a partner." Chara said. Frisk blinked, confused as he followed the other human out.

Sans was back in the clinic, sitting on the other side of the room from a patient. The patient is a monster; he wasn't feeling well and apparently already diagnosed himself.

"I'm tired a lot." The patient said. Sans gave a nod.

"Any other reason you think you have Chronic Fatigue Syndrome?" The doctor asked. The alligator type monster shifted.

"That's kind of the definition of it, isn't it?" he asked.

"It's kind of the definition of growing up." Sans said. The monster shifts before talking again explaining more symptoms, Sans made another snide comment, and the monster continued talking.

"I was also thinking it might be fibromyalgia." He said. Sans stopped and stared at the guy. He let out a slow sigh and popped a pill in his mouth as he rose and left the room, leaving the patient there. He walked to the reception area and up to the counter.

"I need 36 doses of Vicodin; and 75 cents." He said. The nurse looks up at him, as she places the change on the counter. Sans scooped it up and went to a vending machine to by skittles. Once he had them he went back to the counter switching the pills out for the candy while the nurse had her back turned he slipped the pills into his pocket, just as Toriel stormed over to him.

"we need to talk." She said. He set the bottle down on the counter.

"Exam room 3." He told the nurse before turning and looking up at his boss. "What's up?"

Toriel turned silently and walked away, Sans followed his friend. They walked in silence until they got to Toriel's office and she shut the door and turned on Sans yelling.

"What the hell did you tell, Sutton!?"

"why are you yelling?" Sans asked, unable to help himself.

"Do not get cute! Orange guy. Did you tell him his wife was having an affair?" she demanded.

"No, told him that she doesn't care about him." Sans corrected.

"That man is one of the few humans, beside the one who work here, that support this hospital!" Toriel yelled.

"sorry, next time give me their financial statements, so I know who's naughty and who's nice." Sans said, grinning.

"That is not how you talk to patients!" Toriel told him.

"Actually it is. If you don't want me talking that way to patients, don't make me talk to them." Sans said before he turned and left.

Sans returned to his office and was greeted by the sight of his family, he smiled. He sat down and chatted with them for a while. They stopped and looked up as Frisk and Chara walked in. Chara immediately started to report as Frisk sat down.

"She's getting worse fast; vision comes and goes; losing muscle control. I'm convinced it's infectious." Chara said. Gaster frowned.

{No chemicals, no medication?}

"Nothing that would explain these symptoms." Chara answered.

"No fertilizers, nearby chemical plants?" Papyrus asked.

"Nothing." Frisk said.

{No family history of neurological problems?"} Gaster asked

"Not that I could tell from the Christmas cards." Chara said. Gaster sighed. Sans shifted and turned to Chara.

"You said 'nothing that explains these symptoms'. What did you find that doesn't explain them?" he asked. Chara talks about what they found, ham is mentioned and Sans paused. He vaguely hears a small argument start between Gaster and Chara but was to lost in thought to actually hear what is being said. Something clicked together. Sans finished the train of thought and yelled shutting both his father and Chara up. He didn’t know what the petty argument was about and he didn't really care as his doctor was an idiot.

"You idiot!" he yelled sitting up fully.

"I didn't-" Papyrus must have also been involved with what ever happened.

"Not you! Her!" he pointed to Chara who blinks. "You said you didn't find anything!" he accused.

"Everything I found was in my-"

"You found ham!" Sans yelled.

"So?" Chara asked. Sans resisted the urge to face palm.

"Where there's ham, there's pork. Where there's pork, there's neurocysticercosis." Sans said.

{Tapeworm? You think she has a worm in her brain?} Gaster asked.

"It fits. Could have been there for years. It didn't even occur to me because she's-"

"She eats ham, millions of people eat ham- bit of a jump to a tapeworm, isn't it?" Frisk asked. Sans paused and looked at Chara.

"Okay, Ms. Neurologist; what happens when you give steroids to someone suffering from tape worms?" Sans questioned. Chara blinked.

"They get better… then they get a lot worse." She answered

"Just like Summers did." Papyrus said looking over to his brother who met his eyes.

~*~*~Sans, and his team~*~*~

"In a typical case, if you don't cook it well enough, you digest the pork and free the tapeworm larvae. They've got these little hooks to grab onto your bowel, live there, grow up, to a few feet or so, and reproduce." Sans said.

"Reproduce? There's one lesion and it's in her bowel." Frisk said.

"That's because this isn't a typical case. Tapeworms fertilize 20 to 30 thousand of its own eggs every day. Guess where they go?" Sans asked.

"Out." Chara answered. Sans nodded and started talking again

"Exactly, from fecal material to toilet paper. And if you don't wash your hands well enough… The eggshell gets digested but the egg doesn't. Unlike the larvae, the egg can pass right through the walls of the intestines; into the blood stream and where do the blood stream go?"

"Everywhere." Kid answered.

"As long as it is healthy, the immune system doesn't even know it's there. The worm builds a wall, uses secretions to shut down the inflammatory reaction and control fluid flow." Sans said. He glanced up as Gaster enters; Papyrus wasn’t with him this time so Sans assumed that his brother was working.

"As long as it's healthy. So what do we do? Call a vet; nurse the little guy back to health?" Chara asked.

"Too late for that. It's dying." Sans said. 'The immune system wakes up and tries to devour the invader. The wall around the worm stops regulating fluid flow and everything starts to swell. And that is very bad for the brain."

{It could still be a hundred other things?} Gaster asked. {The lab results show normal levels of eosinophilia.}

"They're only abnormal in 30% of cases." Frisk said.

{Proving nothing} Gaster said. Sans grinned.

"It fits; it's perfect; it explains everything." he said.

{But it proves nothing."} Gaster told him.

"I can prove it by treating it!" Sans said.

{No, you can't} he told his son. {I just spoke with her, she doesn't want anymore treatment; she doesn't want anymore experiments. She wants to go home and die.} Gaster explained. Everyone froze as the information sank in. Sans frowned and looked door staring at the carpet. He sighed and stood, causing his team to look at him.

"…I'll talk to her." He said.

~*~*~Sans~*~*~

Sand stood awkwardly at the foot of the bed, Summers' patient chart in his hands. Rachael Summers laid in the bed propped up by a few pillows, her suitcase is in a chair nearby. She watched the skeleton with curiosity.

"Hi, I'm Dr. Sans." he said.

"It's good to meet you." Summers said. Sans shifted, he didn't like talking to patients, that what his team was for.

"You're being an idiot." He said, deciding it was best to get it over and done with. "You have a tapeworm in your brain. It's not pleasant, but if we don't do anything you'll be dead by this weekend."

"Have you seen the worm?" the woman asked.

"When you are healthy I'll show you my diplomas." Sans said.

"You were sure I had vasculitis too." Summers said. Sans sighed.

"I'm not talking about treatment; I am not talking about remission. I am talking about a cure. But I might be wrong, so you wanna die." Sans said.

"…What made you cripple?" the woman asked suddenly. The question made Sans tense. He looked away, he hated answering it. he sighed, but he supposed the she earned it.

"…I had an accident." He said. "…cracked my femur."

"Couldn't they have done something?" the human asked.

"Plenty, but it hadn't seemed serious. The only symptom was pain." Sans answered. "…before I knew it the crack had turned to a fracture and breaking. Nearly lost my leg."

"Did you think you were dying?" Summers asked.

"I hoped that I was." Sans admitted. The lady nodded slowly.

"And now you hide in your office, refuse to see patients, and hobble around with a cane. Because you don't like the way people look at you. A cripple, because you feel cheated and want to get back at the world. But you want me to keep fighting. Why? Why do you think I'm so much better than you?" Rachael asked. Sans looked at her, and scoffed lightly.

"You're scared you'll turn into me?" he asked.

"I just want to die with some dignity." She answered.

"...There's no such thing." Sans said, he cursed silently because he knew he was opening up to someone other than his family. "Our bodies break down. Sometimes when we're 90, sometimes before we're even born. But it always happens. And there's never any dignity in it. Doesn't matter if you can walk, see, or wipe your own ass, it's ugly. We can live with dignity. We can't die with it." Sans finished, he stepped back then left the room. He spotted his team and his father, who are waiting. "…No treatment." He said before he started to walk away.

"We could apply to a court to override her wishes; claim she doesn't have capacity to make this decision." Kid spoke up.

"But she does." Sans said.

"But we can claim that the brain injury has affected her personality. Right, Chara?" Kid asked, turning to the neurologist.

"It's a pretty common side effect." Chara said. Sans sighed, he knew what they were trying to do.

"But it didn't happen here." He told them.

"You're always preaching the only thing that matters is effective vs. ineffective- more important than right vs. wrong-“ Frisk started to argue. Gaster stopped him.

{He's not going to do it.} he said he looked at his son, {he met her. She's no longer a file, she's a person. He respects her.} Gaster knew the reason Sans didn't meet patients. If he met them then he couldn't just do whatever he wanted. Sans shot him a look. 

"So because you respect her you're letting her die?" Frisk asked.

"…I solved the case; my work is done." Sans said. His team looked at him and Gaster watched him. Sans growled looking away. "Patients always want proof! We're not making cars; we don't give guarantees!" he turned and started walking again.

"I think we can prove it's a worm." Kid said, stopping Sans once more and getting looks from both him and the other two. "It's non intrusive; it's safe. It's not conclusive but-"

"What's the damn idea?" Sans snapped, as he came back over to stand by his father.

"We never took an x-ray of here, have we?" Kid asked.

"It's her brain, why would we take an x ray?" Chara asked.

"Have you ever seen a worm under an x ray? They light up. Just like on a contrast MRI." Frisk explained.

Sans, "…brilliant idea, Frisk." He said.

~*~*~LINE~*~*~

Summers was taken to the radiology soon after Kid mentioned the x ray. After it was taken, it was proven that she did, in fact have a tapeworm in her brain. Kid gave her the medication they had put to the side for when they had gotten the results and told her the side effects, and telling her that is was likely they keep her on the pills even if she experienced all of them.

~*~*~LINE~*~*~

Toriel sat in her office across from her is Sutton. He isn't orange any more, but looks like a mess.

"You look better... and worse." She said.

"I followed her." Sutton said.

"Oh, no…" Toriel murmured, leaning back in her chair.

"I couldn't stop thinking about what that doctor said." He said

"I told you to forget it, he's an idiot." Toriel told him.

"I was orange!" He cried.

"…I don't want to know what you found out." Toriel said.

"You don't care?"

"I'm your doctor; you've been great to this hospital and so I do care about you." Toriel said. "But either way this conversation won't end well. Either your wife is having an affair, which in that case I'd have to apologize to that son-of-a-bitch, or she isn't and you're here because you feel he should be fired. But I can't do that. even at the risk of losing your money. Sans is the best damn doctor we have."

Sutton looked down.

~*~*~LINE~*~*~

Kid smiled as he watched the kids gather around Summers. The young teacher smiled enjoying their company and talking with them. Finally she turns to Kid

"I wanted to thank Dr. Sans… But he hasn't visited." She said.

"He cured you, you didn't cure him." Kid said. That being said, Summer nodded in acceptance and went back to talking and hugging her kids.

~*~*~LINE~*~*~

Sans, papyrus, and Gaster are in a examination room watching the TV that Sans managed to set up. They stay silent as they watch the show. Sans is enjoying the silence as he relaxed. The silence is broken when the door opened and the receptionist walked in with the monster before.

"You have a patient." She said.

"I need a refill." The monster said. Sans looked at the receptionist.

"I need 36 Vicodin and 75 cents." Sans told her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this was 19 damn pages. it was a pain in my ass and took hours.

**Author's Note:**

> the introduction is just to set the mood and cast the characters.


End file.
